make-up free living :)

Earlier this summer I made the decision to throw away all my make up. I hardly wore it anyways this past year, but to completely throw it all away was still a pretty big step for me. Although they where few and far between, there where still days when I whipped out the mascara or liquid liner in moments of insecurity.

To see all my make-up in the trash was both liberating and frightening. I was symbolically vowing to take even more effort to accept myself exactly the way I am, even if I have learned to like the way I look with "thicker, fuller lashes ;)" I was anticipating that it would be difficult to have absolutely no crutch to lean on, though, but made a promise to work through any moments when I felt I needed to wear make-up. I knew I would be stronger for it.

Well guess what. I haven't had any moments like that. Of course some days my self esteem has been higher than others, but over all I feel like my confidence is steadily increasing daily. Why? Because I have been learning to accept and love myself for exactly who I am and want to be, instead of what I think others want me to be like. (Notice that I said "what I think others want me to be like" instead of "what others want me to be like." What we think others want from us is (much of the time) just projections from our own minds that are extremely telling of how we believe we should be like, and has nothing to do with what the others want from us at all. The people in your life who truly love you could not care less if you are wearing make-up, a burlap sack or a banana suit ;))) (Although they may worry that you will freeze your ass off parading around in a burlap sack.) I digress.

 I haven't missed the make-up at all.

The thing about make-up is (I never used to leave the house without it), when you wear it every day you get used to seeing your face with make-up on only, and you become disconnected from the face behind the make-up. It is a stranger, unfamiliar, and we often forget that in its simplicity and purity, it too is beautiful. The lips still sing sweetly without firetruck red lipstick, the cheeks still blush when you see the one you love, and the eyes shine and radiate affection, understanding, and honesty, never missing that pound of eye liner and shadow.

If you choose to be a television watcher, a magazine reader, or a driver on any interstate planted with billboards, you are constantly being bombarded with make-uped, photoshopped, edited images of women among whom there are hardly (if ever) any examples of natural beauty. And yes, they are beautiful too, but they are not real.  I could go on and on about how much cosmetics and other body altering companies profit by manipulating you to feel like you are not good enough, naturally, but at the end of the day it is you who must decide for yourself that you do not need to change yourself in any way to be accepted more by others, and most importantly to accept and love yourself. 

There I have done it. I am placing the responsibility back on us to begin loving ourselves raw and un-altered. You don't look better with make-up on, you just look more like every other girl on the streets and in the media. You, unchanged, are unique, and I hope someday you will know it, believe it, and own it, like I am very much beginning to do.

I love you for exactly what you are and am wishing for you the best day ever! Today, and the next day and the next day and the next day after that.

Finally, I would like to give a public thanks to my Mom, who hardly ever wears make-up and is constantly (although I rarely tell her this) inspiring me to be stronger by being a consistent example of an empowered woman with high self esteem. Thanks Mama!

With love, care, and empathy,
Sofie K.

P.S. It is awesome to take no time at all to get ready in the morning and feel good about how you look too!


P.P.S. Not ready to completely ditch the make-up, but want to start making steps to empower yourself and begin to be comfortable in your skin? Start participating in Makeup-Less Mondays, where once a week you commit to wearing no makeup at all, all day long. It's kindof a thing, Google it ;) Much love to you sisters! (and brothers!)

"To be beautiful is to be yourself. You don't need to be accepted by others.
You need to accept yourself."